Ye Olde Tea Partiers Instant Guide to Political Buzzwords

Attention Patriots! Are you sick and tired of getting your gonads handed to you by those smarty-britches liberals, with their pesky “facts?” Well, if you’re like me, and you just want to reach through your computer screen and throttle their lefty asses for being so smug, but you can’t, because of something called physics, then here’s what you do:

You deflect them with Ye Olde Tea Partiers Instant Guide to Political Buzzwords! Whenever you get cornered on who was president when the economy crashed, or who signed TARP, or, when some Massachusetts union worker mentions Saddam’s WMD’s (I swear, they’re still out there), you just whip out your book, and pick a word … any word. Because the point isn’t to make a point, it’s to deflect their point.

Here, watch this: “So, when George Bush was warned in writing about Osama bin Laden planning an attack 6 weeks before 9/11, why didn’t he bother to read the report?”

You respond; “Clinton!!”

Or, when some California latte sippin’ college professor in Birkenstocks says; “Why did the economy begin to stall over four years ago, and the White House ignored the warning signs insisting; “The economy is robust,” rather than working to prevent the collapse?

You say; “Barney Frank!”

End of argument. At least, temporarily. And while he’s distracted, you tell him that you’re late for dinner, or your Klan meeting — whatever.

So, here are the phrases you need to know. Use them wisely, but use them often. Remember, there’s no truth that’s so entrenched that a little repetitive propaganda can’t unravel it. Hey, it worked for Goebbels.

1) Socialism

2) Ayres

3) Kenyan

4) Marxism

5) Alinsky

6) George Soros

7) Clinton!! (two exclamation marks always required here)

8 ) “Real” Americans

9) Redistribution

10) Muslim

11) Birth Certificate


13) Community organizer

14) 57 States

15) Hussein

16) Chicago

17) Muslim (again, because you just can’t say this one too often)

18) Taxes

19) ObamaCare

20) Hillary

21) SEIU

22) Death panels

23) Reverse racism

24) Cap & trade

25) Black Panthers (actually, just black will do)