Jon Stewart: ‘Puppet Master’ Dick Cheney’s Mind Is The ‘Scariest F*cking Place In The Universe’ (VIDEO)

Sometimes, we need to learn to appreciate the things we have, as Jon Stewart has finally realized about Dick Cheney. “George W. Bush, thank you for not dying while you were in office,” Stewart said after watching the former Vice President’s interview with NBC’s Chuck Todd.

Among other things, Cheney admitted that he and Bush were well aware of the CIA’s torture program, and both agreed with it — Cheney far more enthusiastically, largely because he doesn’t quite understand the concept. In the interview, Cheney told Todd that torture is:

An American citizen on a cell phone making a last call to his four young daughters shortly before he burns to death in the upper levels shortly before he burns to death in the upper levels of the Trade Center in New York City on 9/11.

“And that is why he’s the best worst,” Stewart said. “Dick Cheney: setting this nation’s moral bar at anything incrementally better than the most despicable thing that has ever been done with us.”

Throughout the interview, Cheney defended the torture program because the 9/11 attacks seem to be the only thing that meets the definition, in the cesspool that is Dick Cheney’s mind.  “His mind, I assume, being the scariest f*cking place in the universe,” Stewart said.

Stewart then zoomed in on Dick Cheney’s mind to discover the horrors within:

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via The Daily Show

“Never took him for a brony,” Stewart remarked.

“He’s impervious to doubt,” Stewart said of the former Vice President. “It never enters his mind that the confident, plain-spoken pronouncements of truth are often times complete bullsh*t.”

The Comedy Central host finished by thanking President Bush for his service…in not choking on a pretzel and leaving us with President Cheney: “George W. Bush, thank you for not dying when you were in office.”

Watch the segment, below: