Why Mitt Should Split!

Before I attempt to explain my reasoning about presidential hopeful Mitt Romney, please allow me to tell you all a story about an incident that helped to inspire this response. As many of you know, I live in Conservative-ville U.S.A. of Tea Bagger America, where President Obama would lose a “Who deserves a 2nd term contest” to Adolf Hitler, and most of the people would rather experience cancer than liberalism.

This is life in Arkansas, where Mike Huckabee was governor for almost 11 years, and the news about him deciding not to run was not met with happy cheers of enthusiasm by many of the conservatives who considered Huckabee to be the safe pick who could steal a few, Reagan Democrats from President Obama in 2012. The main sentiment surrounding Huckabee was that he fostered the best nationalized chance to beat Obama in a general election, and apparently; that train of thought was stopped dead in its tracks at the Huckabee station as he announced that he was not running; leaving many conservatives left to ponder why Huckabee has chosen not to run in 2012 leaving them stuck with Mitt Romney.

A Tea Bagger and a Republican were discussing this issue, and here is what they said to me, ‘I just can’t believe that Huckabee is not going to run. He was our best, politically reliable chance. There’s no one left to choose from now. Sarah Palin is just a wannabe celebrity who wants to be a politician. Michele Bachmann is just a Fox News floozy. I don’t even know who Tim Pawlenty is! Ron Paul is just the “Ralph Nader” of the Republican primaries; always there, but never relevant. Donald Trump is nothing but another wannabe celebrity, up-north-Yankee, city slicking, media whore. He should have quit a long time ago, and then there is Mitt Romney! I freaking hate Mitt Romney! There is no way this country will elect a Mormon, cultish candidate like that idiot. He’s the one who coached Obama on how to create Obamacare in the first place, and now he’s the frontrunner for the Republican nomination. What a freaking joke! The country is on its death bed, and all we have to choose from is a Mormon and a Black Kenyan; thanks a lot Huckabee!’

Is it a coincidence that the southern, Bible Belt, White males would choose a fellow Baptist preacher like Huckabee over a less-respected, ideological foreigner like Romney? It’s no surprise to me, and it should be no surprise to any of you, but more importantly; it should not be a surprise to Romney either, because a smart guy like Romney has to be politically savvy enough to know, by now, exactly how a significant number of the traditional, hardcore conservatives feel about him personally, not necessarily ideologically, but almost exclusively personally, which is completely biased. I noticed how the Tea Bagger and the Republican wasted no time in belittling the other candidates, but it was only when it came to Romney that the element of hate appeared, and to me; that speaks volumes about the way that many conservative people think in this area, and vote in this area. It’s not always about the ideologies of the candidate, but it is usually about the personal baggage of the person behind the candidate, especially when that baggage is considered not to be up to the acceptable conservative par.

My only question is: ‘Why are you still here in Conservative-ville U.S.A. Mitt Romney?’ Do you really believe that you can lead the political rats out of town and into the voting booths in 2012? The Pied Piper had a flute. All you have is what so called supporters in your own party are calling Romneycare! It’s too bad that you can’t trade your health care model in for one of those “More-of-the-same” flutes, because you’d probably win the Republican nomination going away then. Every time I see Romney trying to defend, yet distance, himself from his product I’m reminded of the old John Kerry ad from 2004 where Kerry was caught elaborating on how he was for it before he was against it! Republicans labeled Kerry as the proverbial flip flopper and methodically began to swift-boat him into the political abyss. Knowing that; I’d say that it is a fairly safe bet that Romney’s entire, political team will be sweating bullets if the political world finds itself privileged enough to witness “Care-Bowl” featuring Obamacare vs. Romneycare; the teacher vs. student, and one can only imagine what kind of hot potato jig Romney will be forced to breakdance around as he tries to marginalize what is arguably his greatest political contribution during the debates.

Why go through it Mitt? Maybe it’s time for you to split. I’m not suggesting that you should join the Democratic Party, but I an Independent stance might serve you better and more fairly than the conservative simplicity that you’ve tried in vain to meet with in the muddled middle of the conservative, toy soldier brigade. One of my biggest complaints involving the conservative/GOP ideology is the harsh, ironclad, political reality of the handed down, marching order, where anyone who dares to ‘go rogue,’ and stray away from the fly-paper like blueprint can be demoted from frontrunner to backburner in a sound-bite second. Now there is only one of two reasons why so many conservatives are so demanding that their candidates be willing, more like obligated, to toe-the-party-lines at all costs. One reason would be because they honestly believe in their ideological brand, and the other reason would have to be to utilize the conservative lasso on any so-called ‘maverick’ who dared to become independently directional at the expense of political loyalty by the individual and the political, control forfeiture of the individual, which would be great for something new, but terribly bad for the more-of-the-same status quo that conservatives have worked so hard to preserve.

Just take a look at what’s been happening to another presidential hopeful, Newt Gingrich, after he criticized Rep. Paul Ryan’s “Wally Cleaver the budget beaver plan,” which dams up the river of Medicare, while promising the fickle a mythical trickle farther downstream that will run out as quickly as it shows up. Apparently, criticizing the Ryan plan is the newest cardinal sin that conservatives had better know not to break, regardless of how much of a Trojan Horse it really is. So let me get this straight. Newt opinionatedly chastises the Ryan plan based on philosophical differences; only to be met by a herd of angry, stampeding, GOP elephants fully intentioned on politically trampling poor, old Newt into the liberal abyss, while in the meantime; almost every Republican, Tea Bagger and conservative baby’s momma has unmercifully and methodically bludgeoned Mitt and his Romneycare albatross! Now if Newt had just gone by the playbook and followed the other drones in attacking Romneycare, he might be in consideration for the frontrunner position instead of being in the politically conservative, rearview mirror position. Let’s face it! If there was ever a political party that lived and died by the motto of: ‘Don’t bite the hand that feeds you or the lies that lead you,’ it’s definitely the GOP!

This is why Mitt should split. If I was Mitt Romney, there is no way that I would be taking my political queues from wannabe candidates, perennial candidates, self-absorbed shock jocks, half-term governors, or journalistic scavengers who will cannibalize their own just as quickly or even quicker than they would expectedly feed on their opposition, as long as it meant more power for them. I could not spend the rest of my political campaign as an apology tour for Romneycare. If the people of Massachusetts didn’t have a problem with it; seeing as how they’ve had ample time to repeal it by now, I’d tell my fellow carnival barkers to get off of my Romneycare backside until they can come back with something substantially better and something courageously more courageous than a $15,000 voucher program immersed in a misleading jug of Paul Ryan Kool-Aid. I hear variations of Democrats and liberals all of the time voicing their praises and criticisms of President Obama and the Democratic Party. I don’t know if there is any liberal or Democrat whose ideologies are off limits the way that Paul Ryan’s flavor of the month Frankenstein seems to be so politically untouchable to his cohorts. One side looks more like an actual democracy, while the other side behaves more like a barren, leaderless dictatorship, and you wonder why I like progressives.

The way I see it, If I’m smart enough to help develop a new, health care plan that actually covers people, then maybe I’m just a tad too smart to sign up for the drone camp in the GOP, domino line. If Paul Ryan’s “Titanic” is considered to be more courageous than a plan like Romneycare, which is a plan that was arguably ahead of its time in principle, even if the results have failed to become utopian to this point, I still believe that Romneycare beats Ryan’s Medicare Axe. So it would be time to move on if I was Romney, because I’d rather be smartly unpopular instead of foolishly famous. Who’s the bigger idiot; the main idiot or the idiot who idiotically follows, because trying to sell an ideology like Romneycare to conservatives is like trying to sell Calculus books to Beavis and Butt-Head!

All of this would be like me trying to distance myself from my book The Fear of Being Challenged; I Am the Realacrat, because some oppositional, anti-liberal force comes along and builds its version of my Realacrat ideology. Now all of a sudden, a book that many of my constituents had voiced marginal complaints over is magically transformed into Adolf Hitler’s Mien Kampf, with me saying that my book is only a fairly good read to people on social networking sites like Facebook or information sites like Addicting Info.Org, but it was never designed and never intended for a national or worldwide audience, because it wouldn’t work. I don’t know if my book would be embraced on a nationalized level or on a global level, and even though Romney is convinced that his health care plan will not work on a nationalized level, the best that either of us can do is to speculatively pander, and Romney has done a fine job with that. Once you put an idea out into the world for consumption, it’s no longer just your idea, and anybody can utilize it as is or improve upon it with their additives; including the first, African-American president; much to the chagrin of the GOP.

For all that any of us know at this moment, someone else could always spontaneously appear with a new, health care plan somewhere in the no-so-distant-future that’s a hybrid of Obamacare and Romneycare called “Somebody Else’s Care” or “Obamny Care” and it could turn out to be the seven, health care cities of gold that we are still endlessly searching for. Now is that possible? I don’t have that answer. Romney doesn’t have that answer. President Obama doesn’t have that answer, and Michele Bachmann, certainly, does not have it, because none of us can, with any amount of certainty, rule it completely out. So Romney, I’d be hesitant at best to totally abandon something before the verdict is in, but I wouldn’t be hesitant to move on from any organization that would. Imitation is the highest form of flattery, and fair weather, political friends are the lowest form of integrity! You can lead a thirsty conservative to water, but you cannot make them drink, unless you’re crafty enough to convince them that it’s not a socialistic, liberalized, Democratic, Kenyan pond.

And as far as this most recent action by Romney of him not signing the indoctrinary, politically shackling and overall politically debilitating ‘pro-life pledge,’ I say good for you Mitt! As a potential, presidential nominee and a potential President of the United States, I definitely would not want to see you joining some conservative, Jonestown version of the “He-Man Woman’s Hater Club,” by entertaining the slightest notion of some socially engineering, “Little Rascals,” wedge pledge! It’s not Romney’s Mormon background that concerns me the most—it’s that proverbial ball and chain of ideological conservatism that conservatives look to tie around him first and us, the American people, last!

Bryian K. Revoner

Author of the book The Fear of Being Challenged: Democratically Independent; I Am the Realacrat